Well anyways, I've always believed that saying I'm Christian was just the only way going to heaven. I never prayed, barely went to church, slept during worship, or try to sleep as late as possible so I don't have to go to church. This has been going on for about 4-5 years...I lived a not so great life when I didn't meet God, I used to steal, there was cussing in every sentence I would say, just hurt people for no apparent reason, and just being a stubborn kid. I would get mad at every little thing and lose my temper. I even went through an emo phase once, around 7th grade, and that year was like my not so great year, being all rebellious, not caring about life or other people, only thinking about myself. Also I guess things that made me this way was that I was just around the wrong crowd, growing up being all shy and not having many friends, growing up practically alone, and feeling alone since like the beginning of 8th grade. Then something happened, that I realize to this day, that I think God was sending people out to me. I've always been feeling alone, and felt like something was missing in my life. I found out that something was love, but I though it was love from another person that I was missing. Then it came around November 22, 2007, my very first community service and this part of the year was the same time when Pastor Che came to Hanin and the youth group was falling apart. At first I didn't care about these outreaches, and other stuff, I felt like it was a waste of my time, but one person just reached out to me and kept trying to persuade me to go, and I said I'll think about, and actually thinking about not going. But she kept asking me every time I saw her, so I gave in and decided to go, and I'm glad I did, I met more new friends, it was a new experience, but I still decided not to go to anymore of these. That person who never gave up on me was Grace Kim, having an open, caring, and loving heart, to reach out to many and not giving up on someone like me. My next step was Winter Retreat 07 At YMCA Blue Ridge Assembly, with the speaker Pastor Cedric Choi. At first I only wanted to go because I wanted to snowboarding, and what guy doesn't want to go try snowboarding for the first time? So I went and this retreat is what turned my whole life around in another direction. Also the love I mentioned before that I was looking for wasn't from another person. As a matter of fact, it was the love for and of God that was missing. Also the theme of the retreat was about the love of God. On the last night of praise, I actually decided to pray, and to tell you the truth, I didn't know what to pray for. So i decided to pray for random things, and just prayed for others, I didn't know what or how to pray for others so I just used some of the words I remembered when others prayed for me. Then while I was praying, another thing helped change my life, a song. That certain song was called Second Chance by Hillsong United and these verses was helped me open my eyes and ears and actually hear what these praise songs actually meant. I was also afraid at the same time that I wouldn't get a second chance to turn my life around, but these verses came up: You called my name, reached out your hand, restored my life, and I was redeemed, the moment you entered my life. Amazing Grace, Christ gave that day, my life was changed, when from my shoulders, fell the weight of my sin (and at this part I actually felt like something was being lifted from my shoulders, I felt no more burdens, I just felt really light), so it's with everything I am, I reach out for your hand, the hope for change, the second chance I've gained (this part I finally understood that I would be given a second chance and I can change). On you I throw my life, casting all my fears aside, how could greater love than this ever possibly exist. Consume my thoughts, as I rest in you, I'm now in love, with a saviour, bearing the marks of his love. So I'll wait upon you now, with my hands released to you, where a little faith's enough, to see mountains lift and move, and I'll wait upon you now, dedicated to your will, to this love that will remain, a love that never fails.
That was the whole lyrics, and once this retreat was over, I believed that a new chapter had opened in my life. Now I see that I was wrong. The first chapter started to unravel at Ignite 08. On the first night, Starfield came to perform, and that was the only reason I wanted to go to this conference. Then the second day, was when I started to realize that I had a long way to go to get to my first chapter. The speakers, helped me come to realize the outside world I still lived in and what I actually was doing. Then came to this one part where we donated the shoes we were wearing on our very feet, to children in Africa, or other poor countries with children that needed shoes more than us. I kinda hesitated on to decide to give up my shoes, because my parents were probably gonna get mad, but then I didn't care because maybe something like this will help me get closer to God, help me turn a new page in my life. That day was also a day I broke out into tears, while praying, realizing that I still was living the life I used to live, still cussing, and other things I used to do.
Next I started to work my faith in God, changing the things I did slowly into something better. My cussing started to cease more, my temper/anger issues a little more controlled, until finally I was able to not cuss anymore, anger and everything fully controlled, but I do admit that I would still flare some anger here and there not controlled. As I continued to learn more, I decided to go to the Wednesday Night Intense Bible Study. From that I learned a lot from others and Pastor Che. The came around the month of November and December. Everyone including myself getting pumped for Winter Retreat 08 Heart Revolution! But before the retreat something came up that shocked the whole youth and left many saddened. Pastor Che was leaving the youth group. Many were devastated, and the person who were gonna help us was Pastor Paul and Pastor Nam (the one that can just teach us about love, a loving and heart warming pastor). It was time for Winter Retreat 08 held once again at YMCA Blue Ridge Assembly and there were also amazing people coming down to be with us and help us from Ohio. The speaker was Pastor Daniel. Our theme this time was Heart Revolution, and this verse: "I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. And I will put my Spirit in you and move you to follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws." Ezekiel 36:26-27
This retreat helped many to get pumped up for God and actually ready to lead a Heart Revolution amongst ourselves and others. Our last night was also amazing where to show our love we went outside and made a huge circle filled every single person at the retreat. What we did is we all went around and hugged each other for being here and able to experience a life changing moment.
After Winter Retreat 08, there was a moment where most people sensed that people were already falling away. So next came the Spring Revival in March. Here the people from Ohio came again, but we had different speakers this time, Pastor Ethan. This revival was held at Antioch. This revival helped many to come to God, confess to him, and to be able to live for him. Being prayed over by many amazing people and a surprised visitor who helped with the revival was Pastor Che. Everyone was thrilled to see him again, and we had a chance to pray for him once again in person since the day he left. At the revival people were just on fire for God once again, and to this day, I believe that Hanin Youth still is and this fire will keep on growing.
Then the month after this revival, this month, Pastor Paul was asked to leave, of course many were saddened by his leaving, and for what all he and Pastor Che has done to get the youth where we are today, but we were also happy for him, because then there will be many others, whose lives will be changed, and knowing that God has big plans stored for him, and me and the youth. Our new youth pastor now turned out to be Pastor Aimee joining us again. Now with Pastor Aimee leading us, I know that something big will happen, and that I and the youth group will keep growing, many leaders stepping up to serve and lead. We will continue this heart revolution, and I will not be shaken. Me, the youth group, and many others, will shine the Light of Salvation, become history makers in this land, speak truth to all mankind. I will do my best and keep growing so that I may not become the person i used to be 2-3 years ago. This is the new chapter finally unfolding. Now all I need to do is wait and see what God has in store for me and the youth, speaking through Pastor Aimee and Pastor Nam.
This is what the Heart Revolution is gonna be and the heart revolution will continue!
For the ones who know this already:
I say: heart
you say: revolution
heart revolution
Heart Revolution!
HEART REVOLUTION!!!!!!
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